How do I know if I’m ready for the monastery?
St. Bede’s discernment and formation process gives candidates a pretty good idea of the practicalities of how to become a monk. There are periods of exploration and spiritual direction. The candidate is called to pray and spend time with the community. And it all leads up to the Benedictine vows that all monks share.
These are defined benchmarks that show a candidate his progress and give him a better understanding of what awaits him.
But when you ask “How do I become a monk,” what you may really find yourself asking is “How do I know if I’m ready?”
That could be emotionally or spiritually. It could be the question, “Is this really what I want?”
Discernment and formation help a candidate answer these questions honestly. But it’s common to doubt and second-guess oneself. While only you can answer these questions, you certainly aren’t the first to bring them up. St. Bede’s monks are keenly aware of what is required of a man who enters the monastery. And even St. Benedict has discussed when someone is truly ready.
You can learn more about what the call to monastic life means here.
What St. Benedict says
In Chapter 58 of The Rule, St. Benedict describes "The Procedure for Receiving Brothers." The writing is directed to established monks, but sheds light on what a prepared postulant looks like. He writes:
"Do not grant newcomers to the monastic life an easy entry."
The direction may sound harsh. But it is, in fact, a chance to examine whether a postulant’s desire is deep and enduring.
Throughout The Rule, St. Benedict often lists qualities to look for in a monk: humble, obedient and patient. And perhaps most importantly, he should be eager to seek God and willing to preserve through the challenges of monastic life.
When a candidate spends time in the monastery—in the early days of discernment—the other monks are also discerning his place. Is he eager to seek God? Or just looking for an escape?
Has he already established his own sense of self?
Can he live this life, with all the human imperfection that comes with it?
Is he capable of relating to others?
You are seeking God, not escaping life
Many in the secular world may experience a draw to the monastery. But oftentimes, God and a holy life is not central to that pursuit.
Instead, he may be escaping loneliness or the overwhelming responsibilities of a career. Some may even be running from relationships or fleeing emotional pain.
The issue is that our monastery in Illinois does not resolve these problems. In fact, he may encounter them to a greater degree once he’s become a part of monastic life. Benedictine silence, especially, can bring these struggles to the forefront.
You can learn more about the Benedictine approach to silence here.
Early on in discernment, a wise vocation director could ask the postulant, “What are you running towards? And what are you running from?”
Answering this question early and honestly will help ground your understanding of what monastic life will look like.
You have a reasonable sense of self
Monastic life will force you to live with humility. And not just the material humility of poverty, or the humility to follow routine and assigned work.
You will regularly be faced with correction and redirection. You will be called to reflect and adjust as means of strengthening your relationship with God and serving your Benedictine community.
As such, a monk must know their strengths as well as their weakness. He should be able to accept correction and not be driven by the approval of others. And a strong emotional resilience is key as well.
You can live with human imperfection
You would be forgiven for having a romantic view of monastic life. The idea of the monastery conjures images of monks living in prayer and harmony. Daily rhythms are defined. The community cares for each other’s needs. And many of the struggles of the modern world are completely nonexistent.
But monks are still human. And communal living is meant as a means of formation, challenging the monks every day to follow the model of Jesus.
You can learn more about communal living at our monastery in Illinois here.
That means personalities often clash and you may be irritated by your fellow monks. No monk is perfect, so mistakes do happen.
The call to monastic life—from the community to the solitude—requires a candidate who understands how to manage healthy relationships. That means how to communicate honestly as well as respect boundaries. A monk must be able to maintain friendships, as well as resolve conflict.
Because of this, forgiveness becomes a routine practice. In fact, it’s a cornerstone of living among monks like St. Bede’s. So instead of a call to live in harmony, a Benedictine monk is called to face human imperfection head-on and allow themselves to be formed by it.
You know how to persevere
Perseverance is key in navigating the emotions of entering the monastery. You may experience strong spiritual highs, but if they are fleeting or inconsistent, they may not actually be guiding you to Benedictine life.
Instead, a candidate should be someone who shows up consistently in prayer and responsibilities, as well as in their relationships. While challenging, monastic life doesn’t form a man through sheer intensity. Rather the formation happens over time through consistent work and monks’ prayer, dictated by the rhythms of the monastery.
Because of this, a willingness to be formed is one of the strongest qualities a monk can bring to the monastery. He must be ready to trust in God and his fellow monks to live this life of holiness, through whatever challenges it may bring.
If this post has helped to clarify your pull to our monastery in Illinois—and you want to continue the conversation of how to become a monk—please get in touch using this form.
